This just in: Dad has apparently decided that along with his new digs in Utah, he's going to assume a new identity. No longer will he be identified as "Dick" as he has for the last five decades at least. Instead, he's been greeting each new acquaintance with a hearty handshake and a chipper introduction: "Little Richard! Good ta meetcha!"
Little Richard.
Little Richard.You're probably wondering why I'm not there helping out. Let me explain: Little Richard was alarmed and offended that I would even consider going, as who was going to watch over our cats? No, I absolutely needed to stay here and make sure they get their full eighteen hours of sleep. He wouldn't hear of both Michael and I being gone for a whole week. You can imagine how disappointed I've been to get left out of the fun.
As Little Richard's gotten older, he's become intensely sentimental over animals, especially cats. He was quite distraught that he was unable to catch the feral cats he's kept as outdoor pets. He'd been planning to catch and transport them to a completely unfamiliar environment where they'd no doubt make tasty treats for their new and unknown enemies. Fortunately, Bobtail Momma, Bobtail Tommy, Pretty Boy, and Pretty Girl were so freaked out from the moving truck and foot traffic that they didn't show up for the exodus and he had to leave them behind. It's a good thing--they're so fat from eating field mice that their bellies nearly drag on the ground. They'll be fine. Little Richard will be fine, too, as Little Misty (his indoor cat, whom he also calls Mitzy, Missa-Mitzy, Misty Mitsa Momma and other garbled variations) made the trip with no trouble.
As Little Richard's gotten older, he's become intensely sentimental over animals, especially cats. He was quite distraught that he was unable to catch the feral cats he's kept as outdoor pets. He'd been planning to catch and transport them to a completely unfamiliar environment where they'd no doubt make tasty treats for their new and unknown enemies. Fortunately, Bobtail Momma, Bobtail Tommy, Pretty Boy, and Pretty Girl were so freaked out from the moving truck and foot traffic that they didn't show up for the exodus and he had to leave them behind. It's a good thing--they're so fat from eating field mice that their bellies nearly drag on the ground. They'll be fine. Little Richard will be fine, too, as Little Misty (his indoor cat, whom he also calls Mitzy, Missa-Mitzy, Misty Mitsa Momma and other garbled variations) made the trip with no trouble.
2 comments:
Hysterical again. Oh man Michelle, I was laughing so hard. I so needed that laugh today. Little Richard. ah man. Every time I think about it, I bust out laughing.
It could be worse. My father-in-law is your dad, but without the quirkiness. Same vanity, egocentricity, ... (sort of a Little Richard without the tutty-fruity). But despite all his limitations, somehow that self-absorbed man produced a charming daughter. So you see your dad and my father-in-law do have a lot in common.
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